Broken down in Glasgow

I have really messed up my life this time. I need help but I seem to be unable to find it anywhere. Where can a guy with a bad credit rating get his grubby hands on £1000 by Tuesday? Nowhere.
As you can see from the title, this is just a count down till I finally do it and shuffle off this mortal coil.
I know that it's impossible to stop this, but for some stupid reason I can not give up hope.

So here we are, I'll post as often as I can, and you get to hear all my arguments for and against my suicide on Tuesday morning.